As I hailed my first taxi EVER, I knew this was the beginning of a great time. I made my way out of the airport, past the momentarily sleepy ports, and all the way down to South Beach! The things I would see over the next few days would not cease to amaze me any time soon.
The People...
First of all, there are no shortage of models in this area of town, which, by the way, goes to bed somewhere around 5am from what I can tell. I'm pretty sure I looked like I was missing a chromosome with my mouth constantly open in amazement at all the glamozons. I have NEVER seen so many beautiful women in all my life on the planet Earth. Having said that, it was really wasted on me. Now the men... good lord in heaven on roller-skates... I've seen fewer six-packs on the Ab-Roller infomercial!!! I was painfully aware that I had left my abs back in 2nd grade somewhere. I couldn't decide which was in greater supply, pretty people or amazing food. I guess they will always run a tight race in Miami. I quickly realized this is not a place for insecure people, so I had to get over myself quickly or I'd be relegated to my room the entire time...windows shut, curtains drawn, and lights OFF! ☺
The Food...
(See I came out of my shell) ☺
The food was OUT OF THIS WORLD. Even at the most "low-budget" type of establishment, the food was just GREAT! I think I had pizza in some form or fashion about 8 times while in Miami. Now, on the other side of this "coin" is that all the restaurants have their dining situated on either side of the side walk. This means you have to pass through every single restaurant to get to where you are going...that is unless you walk on the opposite side of the street altogether. Let me tell you, whoever came up with this idea is no fool. I was constantly accosted by primarily Russian hosts and waiters all but begging me to dine with them. They all had the same specials...which were...not so special. Depending on the day of the week it was "20% off"... "2 for 1"... or "our menu is half off". If you plan on going to South Beach, just plan on paying $20-$40 per person unless you plan on doing Subway or McDonald's. Overall, I can't complain about the pricing too much. I enjoyed every bite of my frequently over-priced meals!
The Shopping...
Holy bankruptcy Batman!!! I had to convince myself that eating was as important as shopping. I really wanted to trade my meal power for purchasing power! Every shop that you can think of and some you can't, is located in the South Beach area. If it's not on Collins Avenue, it's on Lincoln road in what has to be the coolest outdoor shopping area EVER! Lincoln road is pet-friendly, gay-friendly, and credit card-friendly! If you feel like borrowing against your 401K or selling a kidney you can really go wild! I loved that stores like The Gap, in Miami, had vastly different clothes than The Gap stores in my area. "Hello. My name is David and I have a problem shopping at the The Gap in Miami". "Hello David"
The Bottom Line...
The Golden Girls said it best with their Miami jingle...
I have to say what I feel... Miami has so much appeal. A great place to get a seafood meal... Mi...am...i! Miami... Miami... You've got style... blue sky... sunshine... white sand by the mile. When you live in this town each day is sublime... the coldest of winters are warm and divine... Miami... Miami... You've got style... blue sky... sunshine...white sand by the mile. There's golf clubs and night clubs all within reach... Dance the Samba till morning... then lie on the beach... Each view is a postcard... Each day a great time... The cream of the crop... Its the top of the line! Miami... Miami... You've got style... blue sky... sunshine... white sand by the mile.
Miami... you've got style!
