Forgiveness is a concept I've failed to completely understand. It's an ideal which is even more difficult to practice with any sense of regularity. As I sit here soaking up the brisk Autumn air, I can't help but wonder... Is there a right or wrong way to forgive? This question only leads to more questions for me.
Where is the line between forgiveness and foolishness? Are we foolish to forgive someone who has transgressed against us on the deepest most hurtful levels? Are we just being stupid? Should we withhold complete forgiveness so that we can learn from past mistakes and avoid future heartbreak? Can we ever really "forgive and forget"? These are all questions I struggle with. While my upbringing tells me that we should always forgive and without end, I find that is easier said than done.
I believe forgiveness does not come easily. I also believe it is a choice; one that has to be made on a moment by moment basis. I may never perfect the act of forgiveness in my life. I will continue to strive to make that choice. I think it's important for my soul to be able to. While forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, it allows us to acknowledge that nobody is perfect and we all need a little grace in this graceless age in which we live. The song The Heart of the Matter says it best I think. This song was originally written by Don Henley but the version by India Arie speaks to me in a way that is most indescribable. Below is an excerpt from that song...
These times are so uncertain
There's a yearning undefined
And people filled with rage
We all need a little tenderness
How can love survive in such a graceless age
And the trust and self-assurance that lead to happiness
Are the very things we kill, I guess
Pride and competition cannot fill these empty arms
And the work they put between us
You know it doesn't keep us warm
I've been trying to live without you now
But I miss you, baby
The more I know, the less I understand
And all the things I thought I figured out, I have to learn again
I've been trying to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my heart is so shattered
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore...
My Challenge For Today:
Offer forgiveness... expecting nothing in return but a soul put at ease.
